Is This How You Use a Self-Destruct Switch?!-Chapter 22 : Orange Juice?

If the first time she pressed the button, Tsuan experienced the cardiac arrest-like sensation of consciousness being instantly stripped away, the void and relief—as if her soul was gently extracted by invisible forces, leaving only the drowsiness of the world rapidly entering darkness...
Then this time, when that button slipped from her hand and eerily lit up with a spot of crimson in midair, like a demon's wink avoiding her fingers.
Everything in her vision—the azure sky, Amber's profile, the cold edge of the rooftop—all twisted, stretched, and deformed wildly!
The air was no longer a gentle medium but became a viscous... malevolent fluid. It violently tore at her hair, uniform, exposed skin... making suffocating shrieks, filling her mouth and nose, depriving her of any last possibility of breathing.
Wanting to breathe...
She opened her mouth, trying to snatch a bit of oxygen from the air, but only managed to make faint gasping sounds in vain.
Soon, even this last bit of sound could no longer be made.
Her internal organs were pierced by broken bones, blood overflowed from her mouth and nose taking away the last bit of warmth, survival instincts were triggered by pain, but in this situation only increased Tsuan's suffering.
Unable to breathe, unable to move, unable even to blink.
The feeling of her body being roughly crumpled into a ball and then thrown into a shredder to filter out her soul was roughly like this.
Fortunately, it didn't take long before her fragile heart completely stopped beating.
Only then did Amber hear that tremendous crash... it seemed her magic still understood flexibility.
Probably.
The blanket was like a heavy yet fragile cocoon, wrapping Tsuan tightly. The house was very quiet, with only occasional vague sounds from outside the window, and her own overly clear... slightly hurried heartbeat.
Thump, thump, thump.
This sound should have proven vitality, but now it was like some cold countdown, reminding her that she had just completed a "payment," reminding her that now was the time she could be seen, reminding her... not to waste it.
She could clearly feel the softness of the mattress beneath her, could sense the warmth of the air in the blanket, could even distinguish the faint shampoo scent that belonged to herself... remaining on the pillow.
But something was missing.
Her right arm, which had already been crushed, lifted to stroke her sweat-dampened forehead. Her left arm supported her body as she carefully jumped down from the bed, moving her body while waiting...
Looking at the empty Line, Tsuan irritably tugged at her long hair.
Can Reiko and Megumi-chan see me now?
If they can both see me and remember me... why, why haven't they asked how I'm doing even now?
Tsuan had thought that after dying, she would immediately receive care and companionship from her good friends, at least not being completely ignored like before.
But reality cruelly reminded her that this life hadn't bought her what she wanted.
Isn't Megumi-chan Magical Girl Luna? Doesn't she talk about friendship and bonds every day? Why, why have I been missing for so long, yet she still hasn't asked about my safety?
Perhaps because the price paid this time was really too "expensive," Tsuan felt no joy at all, instead constantly complaining.
Complaining that this payment wasn't worth it at all, complaining that Megumi and Reiko didn't care about her and weren't really good friends, complaining that Amber had caused her to slip and fall from the sky, complaining that this world used happiness as bait to devour her life.
But she had no choice.
The black-haired girl sitting on the sofa hugging her arms, wanting to find something to do but not knowing what to do, suddenly had a good idea.
'Anyway, anyway I... can be seen by others now.'
She gritted her teeth and reached up to comb her disheveled hair.
'If Megumi-chan and Reiko don't want to find me, I'll go find other people to be friends with... it doesn't matter! Then we'll see who can't live without whom!'
Tsuan slammed the door shut with a muffled "bang," as if wanting to lock the suffocating feeling and cold loneliness inside as well.
She stood on the clean, tidy street, looking down and forcefully tugging at the hem of her jacket, the action carrying a hint of venting, as if even this outfit had offended her.
A female student wearing the same uniform as her walked past, kindly waving to greet her.
This one isn't as cute as Megumi, no good!
Tsuan smiled in response while removing her from her friendship plan.
This one isn't as gentle as Reiko, no good!
This one's smile isn't as pretty as Megumi's, no good!
○
She walked and stopped like she was patrolling her own territory, repeatedly sizing up the girls constantly passing by, then finding reasons in her heart to reject their friendship applications—even though they had no idea whatsoever.
Her physical strength was rapidly depleting. Each step forward required more effort than before, but Tsuan didn't care at all.
Her body, which hadn't eaten anything for nearly twenty hours, was already at its limit. She found a bench to sit and rest briefly, completely ignoring that someone had already occupied the other side of the bench before her.
She still habitually assumed others couldn't see her.
Her already weak anger gradually diminished under the breeze brushing her skin, replaced by increasingly obvious emptiness and hunger in her stomach.
If Megumi-chan and Reiko were... beside me now...
Before her eyes, groups of two or three girls wearing the same uniform as her kept passing by, but Tsuan never saw Megumi's figure.
The phone screen lit up again. Her expectant fingers skillfully swiped across the screen, finding that messaging app and immediately tapping it.
Just... just acknowledge me now! And I'll forgive you.
But unfortunately, still... nothing.
Her conversation with Reiko stopped at yesterday's photo, and her conversation with Megumi also stopped... at that group photo.
Maybe... to them, I'm not important.
Several strands of long hair danced in the wind, covering Tsuan's expression while also brushing across the hand of the person sitting on the other side, giving her a slightly itchy sensation.
That person turned her head, looking at Tsuan's lonely figure... thought for a moment and decided to pretend not to see.
She wasn't so bored as to mind other people's business.
But the passersby around were very bored.
"Eh? Those two people... what's going on?"
A female student nudged her companion with her elbow, lowering her voice but keeping her eyes locked on Tsuan and her.
One pressed close to the left armrest, one pressed close to the right armrest. To others, they looked like a pair of good friends who had quarreled but were both waiting for the other to apologize first.
And her companion... was precisely Tsuan's classmate, so she only needed to look carefully at those distinctive red eyes to deduce her identity.
And her speculation about the girl beside her.
"Maybe it's Tsuan-san's older sister?"
Whether sibling conflicts or friend conflicts were harder to resolve could be set aside for now.
Tsuan could ignore this kind of discussion, and the girl beside her could too.
This silent confrontation game ended the moment Tsuan wiped the corners of her eyes.
"Tsuan-san is crying... should we go comfort her?"
"Isn't her sister right beside her... this kind of thing shouldn't be our turn to do, right?"
The girl beside Tsuan felt the crowd watching them growing larger. To avoid some fool being blocked by the crowd and unable to see her, she reluctantly walked into the nearby convenience store.
The black-haired girl who was almost unable to resist calling Reiko suddenly felt a cold, hard sensation on the back of her hand.
Looking up, she noticed someone sitting beside her.
And this person was placing a bottle of chilled orange juice by her hand.
Their eyes met for the first time, then separated.
"For you."
As if afraid Tsuan wouldn't understand, she specifically added a "friendly reminder."
"Thank you..."
As she accepted the glass bottle, the watching crowd finally began to disperse. It seemed in their eyes, this pair of sisters had reconciled.
Tsuan once again tasted the flavor of kindness from a stranger, only this time it was much more... delicious than the previous times.
The sweet and sour, cool orange juice slid down her throat, quickly filling her hungry and cold stomach, lifting her spirits.
Sugar flowed into her tired limbs, dispelling the gloom shrouding her heart. The occasional pulp she bit was crushed between her teeth, releasing richer sweet fragrance.
This simple beverage, enhanced by hunger, almost pushed tomato juice down from her favorite drink.
In this sweetness and the companionship of others' kindness, her blurred, tearful eyes refocused and stubbornly displayed the happiness of this world.
The last sip of orange juice was poured down her throat. She placed the empty glass bottle in the trash can beside her.
Tsuan's happiness was missing just the last, simplest puzzle piece.
Tsuan looked at the stranger girl beside her who had shown her kindness... trying to continue her friendship plan.
But her neat, handsome short hair paired with those alert eyes made Tsuan abandon this idea. She lowered her head to refresh Line again... but still no messages.
The atmosphere between them returned to silence again, until... a particularly lively voice broke this quiet.
"Mayumi! So you're here~"
A cherry-pink girl skillfully took the hand of the girl she called "Mayumi," then stuck out her tongue when she remembered that she was the one who had made her friend wait here.
Tsuan reached up to gather her long hair, trying to pretend she couldn't see this scene.
But that intimate, lively voice still drilled into her ears again and again, mocking her pitiful situation of still having no one to pay attention to her...
No, it wasn't that no one cared.
She opened her mouth, wanting to thank her again. But found she couldn't insert herself into this pair of friends' conversation at all.
Maybe because they were from two different worlds to begin with.
Watching this pair of girls walking away, Tsuan raised her arm and gently waved at Mayumi's retreating figure.
But unexpectedly, the other party also turned back at this moment and nodded at her.
Only...
That gaze passed through Tsuan, focusing behind her. In other words... this kind sister was greeting someone behind me?
As soon as this thought appeared, her eyes were covered, and a familiar voice accompanied by warm breath entered her ear canal.
"Tsuan-chan~ Guess who I am?"
Amber watched Megumi frantically comforting Tsuan and went to the supermarket to buy four ice creams.
One for new friend Tsuan, one for good friend Megumi-chan, and I'll eat two.
Delicious.
Tsuan, who had finally recovered from her grievance, raised her head and left a faint tooth mark on Megumi's neck as revenge.
"Uwah!"
Although Megumi didn't understand, she didn't struggle free from Tsuan's restraint, still holding her like this, as if embracing a small cat afraid of being abandoned.
"So what's wrong with Tsuan-chan? Why did you take leave today... are you sick?"
Amber swallowed the cool, pleasant cream and consoled the pouty Tsuan somewhat unclearly.
"Come eat ice cream quickly~ Tsuan-san!"
If you don't eat it soon, it'll melt.
However, if at this time... any of the three magical girls had maintained their transformation state, they probably wouldn't have missed... a special magical power coming from the neighboring city.
○
"This world is black and white... and I am the embodiment of justice."
The crisp tinkling sound seemed abnormally harsh in the dead silent battlefield. The pink and white lace skirt brushed past blood-stained rubble, pure white knee-high socks beneath small leather shoes stepped on scorched earth, leaving clear marks.
That face which should have belonged to a magical girl's innocent romance was now frozen with a cold, almost inhuman obsession.
She surveyed the surroundings. Broken corpses scattered everywhere—there were no more monsters here.
Victory should have brought joy, but in her eyes was only an empty... burned-out ember.
Her gaze swept over the twisted demon remains, like she was checking off items on some list that had to be completed.
However, her sight finally fixed on the edge of the battlefield—what lay there wasn't monster limbs, but a figure in ordinary civilian clothing, caught in the explosion's shockwave, half buried under rubble.
Already devoid of any signs of life. Just an unfortunate... ordinary person caught up in the battle.
The pink and white figure suddenly stiffened.
"No... that's not right..."
Her voice began to tremble.
"I am the embodiment of justice, I am the hero who saves the world... I am the nemesis of evil..."
Her fingers dug into her arms wrapped in lace sleeves, her knuckles white from the force, the magic-covered fabric wrinkled deeply in her grip.
"Then he... is he 'evil'?"
She stared fixedly at that corpse, as if trying to squeeze out an answer she could understand.
"He... he stood at the battlefield's edge... he... he didn't dodge in time... he... he..."
Her logical chain began to tangle frantically. The simple worldview of black and white collapsed thunderously before this gray death.
"Ah... ahh..."
A suppressed whimper squeezed out from deep in her throat.
Immediately after, this whimper suddenly rose in pitch, becoming a sharp, tearing scream:
"Ahhhhhhh—!!!!"
This scream seemed to ignite a fuse.
She suddenly grabbed her head, her fingers frantically clawing at what should have been smooth pink long hair. The pretty heart-shaped hair ornament was torn off, falling miserably into the blood and dirt.
Those hollow eyes were instantly filled with chaos and extreme pain. Her pupils contracted rapidly, reflecting no scenery, only the internal raging tempest.
"Why... why is it like this?! I was born to defeat those evil villains!"
She screamed hysterically at the air, at the corpse, at this devastated battlefield. Her voice cracked from overuse, carrying a heartbreaking sob.
The pink and white dress twisted and deformed with her violent movements. The pure white knee-high socks were covered with stains. Her carefully arranged cute image was completely gone.
"Does this world not need me anymore?! No... it can't be... I'm a magical girl..."
She staggered backward, stepped on the monster's viscous bodily fluid, slipped slightly and nearly fell, but then stood straight as if whipped by an invisible lash, continuing to spin frantically in place as if trapped in an invisible cage.
"I am the chosen magical girl... I am the savior..."
Her magic power began to overflow uncontrollably bit by bit. The pink light was no longer a symbol of warmth and healing but transformed into violent, tiny lightning crackling around her, tearing the air and grinding the rubble beneath her feet to dust.
"You are all evil... I must eliminate you...!"
She raised her magic staff and aimed it at the cheering civilians around her.