Chapter 18 - A Drunkards Negotiation
Youyu looked at Sarutobi Hiruzen with dissatisfaction.
"Why are you yelling? What's with all the fuss?"
Sarutobi sighed, rubbing his temples.
"Forget it, forget it... why am I getting worked up over a drunk kid?" he muttered to himself.
He looked at Youyu, feeling an overwhelming sense of helplessness.
The
most powerful prodigy
of Konoha's younger generation—
and this was him.
If only he
didn't drink so much...
After calming himself, Sarutobi decided to start over, introducing himself properly.
"I am the Third Hokage, Sarutobi Hiruzen."
He expected a respectful acknowledgment. Maybe even admiration.
Instead, Youyu tilted his head.
"Oh, you're the guy with the crystal ball in the women's bath?"
Sarutobi
choked.
His eyes widened, his entire body tensed, and he
almost bit his tongue.
"Who told you that?!"
His voice came out in a strangled shout.
How in the world did this brat
know
about that?!
"Yeah, Youyu, who told you this?" Sarutobi asked carefully, trying to maintain some dignity.
Youyu scratched his head, thinking for a moment.
"Not sure... I think I heard some white-haired guy say it when I was buying wine at a bar?"
Sarutobi's face
darkened immediately.
"
Jiraiya!
"
That idiot! His own
disciple
running his mouth like this!
Sarutobi
ground his teeth.
The next time he saw Jiraiya, there would be consequences.
"Ahem! Youyu, that was nonsense. As the Third Hokage, I would never do such a thing," Sarutobi coughed awkwardly, trying to change the subject.
Before Youyu could say anything else, he quickly moved on.
"Let's forget about that. I called you here to ask a few things."
Youyu shrugged, giving a lazy nod.
"Yeah, yeah. Go ahead."
Sarutobi cleared his throat, regaining some composure.
"Do you love this village?"
"Of course!" Youyu answered immediately.
There was
wine, meat, and plenty of people to cut down
—what wasn't to love?
Sarutobi smiled, relieved by the answer.
Drunks tended to speak the truth, and this was a good sign.
"In that case, there is something Konoha needs your help with," Sarutobi said seriously.
Youyu blinked, looking mildly interested.
Then Sarutobi told him.
"You want me to
enter the Chūnin Exams
?"
"Yes, Youyu. I—"
"Not going."
Sarutobi's words
froze in his throat.
His face stiffened.
"...What?"
"Too much trouble. Not going." Youyu waved a hand dismissively, already looking
bored.
Sarutobi
stared at him.
In all his years as Hokage, he had convinced
stubborn clan heads, war-hardened shinobi, and even political leaders from other villages.
Yet here he was, getting
shut down by a drunk nine-year-old.
"Youyu," he tried again, his tone more serious. "The village is in a difficult position right now. Don't you want to protect the place you love?"
Sarutobi leaned forward slightly, eyes filled with expectation.
He had already
sent invitations to every major shinobi village
—not just their allies, but even their rivals.
This was part of his
larger strategy.
Right now, Konoha was
weaker
than it had been in decades.
The Second Shinobi War had left them scarred. The Senju Clan had suffered great losses, with even
Nawaki, Tsunade's younger brother, dying in battle.
Tsunade had left the village, and without the
Senju
, Konoha had lost a massive pillar of strength.
Then there was the death of
Sakumo Hatake, the "White Fang."
To the outside world, Konoha was beginning to look
vulnerable.
Sarutobi couldn't let that stand.
The Chūnin Exams would be an opportunity to
showcase Konoha's new generation.
And Youyu?
Youyu
was their ace.
Even the most talented genin—
including Kakashi—stood no chance against him.
If Youyu participated, it would send a
clear message
to the other villages.
It was the perfect plan.
But there was just
one problem.
"Youyu, don't you want to prove Konoha's strength?" Sarutobi pressed.
"Nope," Youyu replied instantly.
Sarutobi's
eye twitched.
The stubbornness of this kid—!
Negotiation wasn't working.
Maybe... intimidation?
No, that wouldn't work either.
Threatening a
drunk swordsman
was just asking for trouble.
Sarutobi took a deep breath. If reason wouldn't work... then
bribery.
"Ahem. Youyu, if you take part in the Chūnin Exams and win, I will give you a bottle of good sake."
Youyu's
eyes lit up.
Sarutobi smiled.
Hook, line, and sinker.
But just as he thought he had won, Youyu leaned forward and smacked his hand on the desk.
"
Alright! I'll do it!
"
Sarutobi
nodded in satisfaction.
Then Youyu continued.
"But you have to give me
an entire house filled with sake!
"
Sarutobi's smile
vanished.
His eye
twitched violently.
"Youyu," he said slowly, "I said
a bottle.
Not an entire house."
Youyu
crossed his arms.
"Old man, I heard you loud and clear. You promised a house of sake. I've been drinking for
decades
—I never mishear things when I'm drunk!"
Sarutobi's expression
twitched even harder.
Decades?
This brat was
nine.
Even if he had been drinking since birth, it wasn't
decades.
But... technically, it
had
been nearly a decade...
He groaned, rubbing his face.
There was
no way
Youyu was going to budge.
"Fine!" Sarutobi finally snapped, grinding his teeth. "If you get
first place
in the Chūnin Exams, I will give you a house filled with sake!"
Youyu
grinned.
"Deal! Now, let's make it official.
Pinkie promise!
"
Sarutobi
stared at him.
This brat just
scammed the Hokage himself
into buying him an entire stockpile of liquor.
But at this point?
Sarutobi was
too tired to argue.
With a long sigh, he
held out his pinkie.
"You brat... you better win."
"You kidding? This is the easiest bet I've ever made!"
As the two locked their pinkies together, Sarutobi
prayed to the heavens.
How did this kid make him feel more exhausted than a war?
Word Count: 970
Author Notes:
Sarutobi: "Let me use diplomacy to convince Youyu."
Youyu: "Give me a house of booze."
Sarutobi: "...I hate this kid."
Next Chapter: Youyu vs. The Chūnin Exams!
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← Naruto drinking makes me stronger
Naruto drinking makes me stronger-Chapter 18: A Drunkards Negotiation
Chapter 18
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