Naruto: Reborn as Uchiha Obito-Chapter 164 161: “Congrats, You Pregnant” — Then Dips

In Konoha Village, life had mostly returned to its usual rhythm after the tragedy.
At least… that was true for the ordinary villagers.
But for the major clans who had lost their leaders, their homes still felt gloomy. No matter how lively the streets seemed, the mood within those clan compounds was anything but peaceful.
Even so, rumors still traveled fast in a place like Konoha.
"Hey, did you hear? There's some kind of amazing fortune-teller on the next street!"
"Yeah, seriously! He predicted that Koizumi Ichirō would break his leg today—and the guy actually did! Then he said Araki Takehiko would win three bets in a row… and that happened too! The man's a total miracle-worker!"
"No way… you think he might be a ninja using some kind of divination technique?"
Another man, with a slightly haggard but gentle face, spoke up with an awkward smile.
"I don't know if it's true or not… but my wife insisted on going to see that fortune-teller. I couldn't make it because of work, so my best friend Natsuki went with her instead. I just hope she got whatever 'reward' she was expecting."
"Hahaha! Tamako is really whipped, huh?"
A round-bellied man burst into laughter and slapped him on the shoulder hard enough to make him stumble. "You can't go three sentences without mentioning your wife!"
Tamako scratched his cheek lightly, his face turning a bit red as he looked away, clearly embarrassed.
--
A little farther down the street, in a small, humble-looking shop, sat an athletic young man with an iconic, unchanging spiky black hairstyle.
He wore an orange gi, a martial arts uniform, and carried a clean, earnest expression—simple-minded, determined, and always smiling.
He was the mysterious fortune-teller everyone in the village had been talking about.
"U-um… hello… we're here for a divination too," a young woman said shyly as she stepped inside. She had an average appearance and figure, looking like someone who rarely visited places like this.
Beside her stood a serious-looking man, built sturdily like a construction worker. He wasn't a shinobi, but his physique had clearly come from long, hard labor.
The man eyed the fortune-teller and asked cautiously:
"Is… this sir you?"
"Ahahaha! No need to be so formal—just call me Goku."
The "fortune-teller" laughed warmly, instantly dissolving the tension in the room as both the man and woman visibly relaxed.
"My name is Natsuki Kimora," the man introduced himself.
"Hello, I'm Tsumugi Aiko," the woman followed politely.
"Nice to meet you both," Goku said with a professional smile. "So—what would you like to know?"
Of course, this "Goku" was actually Obito in disguise.
After leaving Mikoto in a very good mood, he decided to entertain himself by testing just how far his future-sight abilities could go… and a fortune-telling booth sounded like the perfect playground.
Next, both the woman and the man hesitated, uncertainty flickering across their faces.
Obito, being an old driver in these matters, instantly sensed the fishiness—but business was business, so he leaned forward reassuringly.
"Don't worry. Everything stays here. If I went around blabbing about my customers, I wouldn't be able to keep this place running, right? So relax."
"I see… that's fine then."
Natsuki and Aiko exchanged a glance and finally let out a shared breath of relief.
With that settled, "Goku" began his performance.
He reached behind him and placed a large, orange, translucent sphere on the table—its surface marked with glowing red stars.
A Dragon Ball.
Seeing it up close, Natsuki and Aiko froze.
The suspicious look on their faces vanished almost instantly, replaced by awe.
Even if they didn't understand what it was, the thing practically radiated mysterious power.
It made them believe.
Exactly as Obito intended.
Obito placed both hands dramatically on the sphere, closed his eyes, took a deep breath…
and began spouting complete nonsense with the seriousness of a monk performing an exorcism.
"The cosmic ripples are aligning… the ancestral chakra pathways are rotating…
I see a shadow… a light… a supermarket… a discounted cabbage… yes… destiny…"
Natsuki and Aiko leaned in closer, swallowing nervously.
Meanwhile, Obito maintained an absolutely straight face—
...but inside his head he was thinking:
Damn, I'm just saying whatever comes to mind. If they believe this, I'm raising the price next time.
Of course, his fortune-telling was technically accurate…
but every single word coming out of his mouth was pure nonsense—carefully crafted for dramatic effect.
After a moment, Obito leaned forward, lowering his voice.
"Alright. Now whisper what you want to know."
The woman immediately flustered up, her fingers fidgeting nervously.
Seeing that she was too embarrassed to speak, the man stepped forward instead, leaned in close, and whispered the question.
Obito nodded slowly, the fake "Goku" expression slipping away as he put on a serious, sage-like face.
He placed both hands back on the Dragon Ball.
The sphere glowed.
Red stars shimmered.
The light brightened, dimmed, then brightened again—
...and then it suddenly turned into a dull stone with a pathetic little "puff."
The couple gasped.
Obito, meanwhile, calmly opened his eyes as if he had just communed with the heavens themselves.
--
"Congratulations," Obito finally said with a warm, professional smile.
"You two will have a healthy baby."
The woman instantly lit up with joy, her eyes sparkling as she covered her mouth in disbelief.
The man grinned proudly and pulled her into a tight hug, relief and excitement written all over his face.
But then...
Obito's enhanced hearing picked up something that made one of his eyes twitch.
"B-but Natsuki-san… what about Tamako?
If he finds out the baby is your—"
Before Aiko could finish, Natsuki slapped a hand over her mouth so fast it was almost ninja-level.
He shot a panicked glance at Obito.
Obito, in perfect actor mode, calmly pretended to be placing the Dragon Ball back on the shelf—
acting as if he had definitely, absolutely, 100% heard nothing at all.
But inside, Obito was screaming:
'Holy shit… L for whoever Tamako is.'
Natsuki let out a shaky breath of relief.
"Not here, Aiko," he whispered urgently.
"I-I'm sorry," Aiko muttered, realizing her slip and nodding quickly.
They both hurriedly handed Obito the payment—barely making eye contact—and rushed out of the shop with the speed of guilty teenagers sneaking out past curfew.
Obito watched their retreating backs and exhaled deeply.
"This world is really…"
He shook his head slowly.
"…full of side quests I never asked for."
He leaned back in his chair and carefully reviewed the results of his latest fortune-telling session.
He had been running this little "business" for a while now.
Sometimes he gave a fake reading, sometimes a real one—just enough truth sprinkled in so people would trust him more each time.
After all, his future sight was now fused directly into his Eternal Mangekyō Sharingan, no longer a separate ability like before.
There were pros and cons.
The good part?
Unlike that senile old toad sage, he didn't have to sit around waiting for a random prophecy to pop up.
He could activate it whenever he wanted.
The downside?
Well… it wasn't really a downside, but it annoyed him anyway.
It drained a ridiculous amount of energy.
Even with his monstrous chakra reserves, he couldn't just spam it all day like a cheap jutsu.
Which is why he often mixed fake predictions with real ones.
That strategy, however, had… consequences.
Ahem.
Several couples had broken up because of his readings.
But Obito just shrugged in his mind.
If they split up because of one sentence from me… then that must've been their destiny anyway.
He thought about it with complete calmness, as if he hadn't just played roulette with people's relationships.
Just as Obito sighed and considered closing shop for the day—or maybe shutting down this "business" forever...
two familiar chakra signatures suddenly approached.
He froze for a split second.
Oh?
Those presences were unmistakable.
His brows lifted in mild surprise, and then—
Still wearing his Goku transformation, he slowly curled his lips into a smile.
A very devious smile.
The kind of smile that said:
Oh, this is going to be interesting.
[Author Note]📢
Hey everyone! Merry Christmas ⛄
Just a quick update — I've started a new Naruto novel:
Naruto: Blackbeard Template
It's a fresh project with cleaner writing and a steadier release pace.
If you enjoyed my previous stories, feel free to check it out!
Thanks for the support 🗣️
— Arthorain